If you’ve ever found yourself feeling guilty for sitting still, mentally rehearsing your to-do list in bed instead of sleeping, or choosing another workout over taking a rest day, you’re not alone.
For many busy women, rest can feel like wasting time. Like pressing pause. Like falling behind. Like if you were stronger, smarter, better you wouldn’t need to rest because you could just push through.
But it’s a trap. One many women gets stuck in.
Because here’s the truth: rest isn’t a break from the work—it is the work.
Your nervous system, muscles, creativity, and emotional regulation depend on it. They don’t weaken because you rest—they get stronger through rest. Rest is resilience.
Learning how to rest intentionally – and in a way that actually feels good – is one of the most powerful performance tools you can master.
Let’s reframe rest so it doesn’t feel lazy, pointless, or unproductive.
Why Rest Feels Uncomfortable Right Now
We live in a hustle culture that celebrates constant productivity, glorifies never slowing down, and normalizes burnout.
Many high-performing women tie their self-worth to what they accomplish and their ability to “do it all.” Anything that doesn’t look like productive action feels … wrong.
But just like your muscles grow in the rest between workouts, your mental and emotional strength are built during recovery, not in the grind.
When rest triggers guilt, it’s often because your brain is wired to equate “doing” with “value.”
That’s why we need to focus on addressing your mindset around rest—so it feels safe, satisfying, and useful.
The Nervous System Needs Downtime
Your body has two primary nervous system states: sympathetic (go mode) and parasympathetic (rest mode).
Modern life has many of us spending the majority of their day in go mode. They’re answering emails, pushing through workouts, juggling responsibilities without taking a moment to shift into rest mode. Even if you love being busy, your body still needs recovery.
Here’s the part many people miss: your go mode gets more productive if you shift out of it into rest mode every now and then.
When you intentionally activate your rest mode through true rest, you boost:
- Creativity and decision-making
- Emotional regulation
- Digestion and hormone health
- Muscle repair and immune function
- Sleep quality and stress resilience
Reframe Rest as a Performance Tool
Instead of thinking of rest as a break from productivity, think of it as a productivity booster. It’s your high-achieving performance-enhancing strategy.
To make rest feel productive, build in low-stimulation resets that signal safety to your nervous system without overwhelming your brain and activating go mode.
Try:
- Structured white space: Block out non-negotiable downtime in your calendar. Treat it like a meeting with yourself. Use this to get into nature, meet with a friend if that feels nourishing, or doing something just for fun. (Naps included!)
- Sensory resets: Somatic (body-based) practices such as shaking, legs up on the wall, body scans, or gentle yoga help regulate your nervous system and shift you into rest mode.
- Low-input joy: Reading a good Romantasy book, snuggling your dog, sipping tea without a podcast, or walking without your phone. These moments are powerful.
Bonus: give your rest a name. Call it your “integration session” or “mental recovery moments”—whatever helps your high-achiever brain respect the pause.
Let’s Clear Up the Confusion: What’s Actually Restful?
Not all forms of rest are created equal. Let’s take a closer look at some common activities and figure out if they’re truly restful, or if they’re just a sneaky way to keep you stimulated and in go mode without real recovery.
Binge-watching TV: Sometimes Restful
If you’re truly relaxed and tuning in for a low-stress, feel-good experience, it could help you unwind. (Think: Friends marathon). But if you’re still reaching for your phone, or using other “numbing” coping mechanisms like uncontrolled snacking, that’s a sign that your nervous system is still feeling dysregulated and NOT in rest mode. Choose wisely! And binge watching TV when you should be sleeping is sacrificing the true rest your body needs—don’t do that.
Scrolling Your Phone: Nope
Scrolling through Instagram, checking emails, or endlessly refreshing Twitter—all of these can seem like “down time.” But in reality, they’re keeping your brain locked in a constant stimulation loop, which is keeping you in the stress cycle and go mode.
Stillness & Breathing: YES!
Now we’re talking. One of the simplest (and most effective) ways to reset your nervous system is to lie or sit still and focus on your breath. Deep, conscious breathing signals to your body that it’s time to relax. This practice not only calms your mind but also recharges your energy. Breath = PRESENCE and VITALITY.
Foam Rolling, Gentle Movement, or Stretching: YES!
These activities are low-intensity but incredibly beneficial as they help your body release tension, increase blood flow, and support muscle recovery. These practices can enhance your mobility and flexibility, which in turn helps you perform better when you’re back to your normal activities.
Doing Nothing on Purpose: YES!
It might seem counterintuitive but doing nothing on purpose is one of the best ways to rest. It doesn’t have to be a long, drawn-out session of “doing nothing.” Even a few minutes of sitting on your porch without a distraction can signal to your brain that it’s okay to relax. This act of purposeful inaction helps you briefly unplug and reset both mentally and physically, preparing you to come back with more energy, focus, and creativity.
Rest is Fuel
Rest is not the opposite of productivity—it’s the fuel behind it.
When you treat rest like a tool for physical recovery, mental clarity, emotional stability, and sustainable success, you stop fighting it. You start craving it.
The more you honor rest, the better you perform in the gym, in your work, and in life. Not because you’re doing less — but because you’re doing it all from a place of grounded, focused, charged-up energy.
So, which “performance-enhancing” rest strategy will you choose first? – Alex
